sigh.. disappointment..

woke up at 12pm today.. was actually fucking waken up by stupid flatmate at 10am.. i mean what the fuck, he even used my "king kong", oh, if u dont know, i use "king kong" to block the bottom of my door so cold air doesnt get in. he even used my "king kong" to slap me in the face.. i mean what the fuck is wrong with him?

"fuck off, r u retarded?"

tat makes him leave.. mumbling some shit that i did not hear and did not want to hear anyway. went back to sleep, and here we go again, he's back! it's okay.. it's 12pm.. so i woke up.

anyway.. didnt do any study today cos he had to go to this garden to take pics for his girlfren.. seriously.. omfg.. and at night, im wasting my time playing games and making this blog..

and what im doing now? wasting my time, waiting for m. i messaged her just now, and i guess she is still working. she complained about the soreness of her legs, well, i guess that is what u get for working as a shop assistant..

and what's worse, exams are coming, first one on tuesday, and i did no shit today. so, off i go to flip thru some notes to comfort myself, fucking disappointing. oh, as the same time, i can wait for m. heh.

the call

i called m last night, she was on her way home, still had 3-4 stations before reaching her place, and something i noted was what she said in the middle of our conversation..

"you know how much i really wanted to come over, after what you said to me last night."

i went "uh huh?"

"i really wanted to stop studying and come over.. do you know that?"

hmm, the feelings that went through me, speechless. maybe i felt appreciated, maybe it's a sign of some joy, something that sparks beautifully for me, maybe. i laughed. and told her how foolish she is, but what my heart wanted, is the opposite.

i want her to come over, i want to see her, i want to take care of her, i want to spend every seconds with her. but that's impossible.

impossible is nothing? nothing is impossible? those are full of shit.